


cream  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

by 400_badrequest



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Crack, Cream, Fluff and Humor, M/M, but make it sexy, if enough people enjoy this i might make a series?, its a lil bit of a snippet from a potential prank war
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-10
Updated: 2021-03-10
Packaged: 2021-03-16 23:21:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 485
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29957439
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/400_badrequest/pseuds/400_badrequest
Summary: “Stiles,” Derek growled, “Why am I currently covered in cream?”
Relationships: Derek Hale & Stiles Stilinski
Kudos: 8





	cream  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Stiles is officially a moron. A bonafide, certified moron, with a major degree in foot-in-mouth-ology and a minor in brilliant idiocy. You know what, he could probably be the God of stupidity at this point. 

But hey! 

He’s had a good run. And it’s not like he didn’t expect to die via supernatural means - Derek did promise to rip his throat out (more than once!). Death via sexy werewolf isn’t the  _ worst _ way to go. Especially when said sexy werewolf is currently shirtless. And sweaty. 

...And currently covered in whipped cream.

Stiles sat sprawled on his ass, hands pressed into the floor of the loft kitchen, staring up at a very squinty Derek Hale. Late afternoon sun trickled through the open windows, as the wolf slowly dragged the tips of his fingers through the mess splattered across his face. “Stiles,” Derek growled, “Why am I currently covered in  _ cream? _ ” 

With a gulp, he watched as Derek wiped his hand across his chest in disgust. Stiles' eyes watched as the cream quickly melted and mingled with sweat, trailing slowly down the dip of Derek’s pecs, and the crease of his toned navel.  _ Fuck _ , he wanted to lean forward and swipe his tongue through it, nibble and suck though his happy trail and down, down,  _ down _ to his -

“ _ Stiles. _ ”

“I thought you were Issac!” He shrieks, snapping to his senses, scrambling backwards. “Please don’t kill me, or rip my throat out, I pretty sure I’d taste terrible,  _ fuck _ I thought you were  _ Issac _ and I wanted to get back at him for stealing my lacrosse gear which he did to get back at  _ me  _ for eating his food which  _ I  _ did because he cheated in Go-Fish, I mean I didn’t even  _ know _ you could  _ cheat _ in Go-Fish, but I swear to fuck he did and I don’t want to die please don’t eat me-”

“Stiles. Shut up.” Stiles’ jaw closed with an audible click. Derek walks into the kitchen, wiping the cream off his body, while Stiles stumbles upright. His eyebrows are drawn together, in less of an ‘I’m going to murder you’ way, and more in a ‘why do I even associate with you’ way. Stiles prides himself on being an eyebrow speech-ologist. Slowly, Derek brings a cream-covered finger to his lips, before slipping it into his mouth, licking it clean. The noise that escapes Stiles's throat could most possibly be classed as a manly whimper. Not a whine. Definitely not a whine. 

“So… you’re not going to eat me?” Stiles winces under the weight of the glare shot his way. “Right. Okay, not eating the human.” Derek continues to ignore him, stalking towards the shirt laid on the back of the couch.

“Why are you still here?”

“Right! Going, I’m going,  _ hell _ I’m basically already home I’m so gone-”

“Just get out.”

  
  


(...was it just Stiles, or did that sound just a tad bit fond?)

**Author's Note:**

> yo lemme know if u enjoyed this bc enough people say yes i might make a series


End file.
